What Does Leading With Compassion and Care Look Like?
As leaders, this year has been a whirlwind. Most years may already seem like the craziest year yet but this year takes the cake as we continue to learn how to lead our teams in this different way of working, surrounded by the chaos that is 2020.
As we’ve been heads-down, learning, growing, and leaping through new obstacles, many of us forget that the people on our teams are going through a lot right now. Are we doing all we can to make sure our teams are okay?
When’s the last time you checked in with your team?
Seriously. When’s the last time you reached out to members of your team and asked, “How’s it going?” No, I am not asking you to check-in on their work, I am asking if you’ve asked how they are doing on a personal level?
A quick story about checking in on someone!
I believe that to be a great leader, you need to build great relationships. I believe that part of this process is being human and by understanding how people are doing in their lives, we are able to help them grow more than we could otherwise.
Here we go.
A while ago, I was leading a new team. This team had team members on it who previously reported to another part of the organization. This team had its own identity, culture, and set of practices, all things you would expect when leading a team that has been together for quite a while. I am the “new guy” in this scenario.
A couple of months into leading this team, I started to amplify my leadership approach with the people on the team. One of those leader-things that I will do is, I will regularly reach out to see how people are doing. All I did was simply ask,
“Hi, just checking in, how’s it going? How are YOU doing?”
That’s it. They responded by saying they were good, which is normal. But, then, they said this,
“Thanks for asking. I’ve never had anyone do that. I’ve never had anyone just check-in on me to see how I was doing. Thank you!”
I was astounded. This person has been a professional software engineer for almost two decades and they are sharing with me that no one has ever checked on them to see how they were doing, and they felt compelled to tell me this and to say thank you!
Great leaders care about their teams!
As Leaders, we are responsible for the humans on our team and to make sure they are okay! Everything else follows. Nothing else is as important as this if you are a leader of a team of people.
I know. The world is crazy. Work feels like insanity at times. There are deadlines and expectations. There’s a constant pressure. Cool. As leaders, we need to find a way to set all of that aside and make sure the people on our teams are okay. If they aren’t, none of those other things matter because they won’t happen near their potential. Team members will burn out. They will leave. Teams will turn toxic. People will stagnate. When our team members don’t feel good, we are failing as leaders.
Checking in with our teams needs to be a priority!
I’m serious. If you take away one thing from this blog post, please prioritize this simple act of leadership, humanity, and compassion, and check-in with your team. Just ping them and ask how they are doing, it’s that simple. Set the work aside and lean into how the people on your team are handling the chaos in their world. It might mean the difference to some. It’s one simple act that we can perform as leaders to start leading with compassion and care.
What else can we do as leaders when we check-in with our teams?
I’ll share a tactical thing from the leader from who I learned this philosophy. He followed up this broad question of “how are you doing” with this. He often asked me, how are you doing on a scale of one to ten. Ten is, “pure joy, nothing could be better.” One is, “awful, I need help TODAY!”
I would respond and say, I am a six or seven. Instead of him asking me, “What would get you to a TEN,” he asked, “What would get you from a six or seven, to an eight or nine?”
This made me focus on incremental improvement instead of sweeping change. It forced me to pick one thing that would help my day. He then offered his support in getting me there.
Compassion and care.
These two words are anchor words for leaders. Meaning, these words, when part of our leadership-bedrock, ensure we are leading our teams in a way that is people-first.
When we lead with compassion, our teams know that we understand what they are going through. When we lead with care, our teams know that we are really listening and are there to help.
It starts with prioritizing small inches like this one, reaching out to our teams to see how they are doing. Listen. Really hear them, empathize, and see how you can help.